Stephanie. 22.
Theatre, Art, & Music Student in New Jersey.
Boston You're My Home.
God. Family. Friends. Adele. Broadway.
Horror Movies. Shoes. Jerry Springer. Beyonce.
Singer. Grad Student. Smartfood. iPhone. Photography. Beat-Boxer.
15. September 2014

I have never been so captivated by another human being before.  

Your mind intrigues me.  I want to know your thoughts.  What you think about life.  What you think about me.  What you think about when you go to sleep at night.  What you think about the world, about shooting stars, about your favorite time of year, about people who drive like ass holes, about your favorite restaurant, about everything and anything.  I want to know why you don’t think you’re good enough.  Why you don’t trust yourself enough to know how special you are.  Why don’t you like being vulnerable.  Why being weak scares you.

Your heart fascinates me.  I want to know why it takes moments when you finally are vulnerable to allow yourself to be loved.  I want to know why you won’t let me show you how much love I can give you.  I want to know the scars on your heart, who left them and why.  I want to know your journey - and I want to be the next part of it.

It’s crazy how much I want to get to know you.  How I just want to spend time learning things about you and taking in your beauty and the light you give off.  I want to know the reasons why you have to act so strong.  What made you build up the walls that keep everyone out.  

I want to know the real you.  I feel like in the time we’ve spent together I’ve been seeing glimpses of who you really are, but it’s not enough, I’m being selfish.  Because I  want to see what this is between us.  What it is and where it can go.  And if it goes no where that’s ok, because at least I can say I tried, that we explored the option.  But I feel like I’m invisible to you.

But there have been brief moments where I know I’m not invisible to you.  Moments where we acted on this electricity between us and when I look back on those moments I can only smile and hope for more.  And I know you feel it too, but I’m getting tired of hoping.  

I just have so many thoughts.  You’ve been clogging my mind.  And these thoughts of you have been distracting me for so long that tonight just pushed me over the edge.  

I want you to want me the same way I want you, but I don’t even have the courage to say any of this to your face.